{"id":12605,"date":"2018-07-26T12:50:44","date_gmt":"2018-07-26T04:50:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/2018\/07\/26\/the-dangers-of-being-nice\/"},"modified":"2021-07-12T11:46:09","modified_gmt":"2021-07-12T03:46:09","slug":"the-dangers-of-being-nice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/2018\/07\/26\/the-dangers-of-being-nice\/","title":{"rendered":"\u89ba\u5f97\u81ea\u5df1\u6709\u7fa9\u52d9\u7576\u500b\u300c\u597d\u4eba\u300d\uff1f\u5fc3\u7406\u5b78\uff1a\u7e3d\u662f\u5584\u826f\u7684\u4eba\uff0c\u662f\u5728\u6eff\u8db3\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u300c\u88ab\u9700\u8981\u300d"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\u300c\u6211\u6015\u5225\u4eba\u89ba\u5f97\u6211\u96e3\u76f8\u8655\u3002\u300d<br \/>\n\u300c\u6211\u4e0d\u5e0c\u671b\u9020\u6210\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u56f0\u64fe\u3002\u300d<br \/>\n\u300c\u6211\u4e0d\u60f3\u88ab\u8a0e\u53ad\u3002\u300d<br \/>\n\u300c\u6211\u60f3\u4fdd\u6301\u597d\u5f62\u8c61\u3002\u300d<\/p>\n<p>\u9019\u4e9b\u8a71\u5c0d\u4f60\u800c\u8a00\u5f88\u719f\u6089\u55ce\uff1f\u8fd1\u65e5\u5728\u570b\u5916\u77e5\u540d\u5fc3\u7406\u5b78\u7db2\u7ad9 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/intl\/blog\/fixing-families\/201807\/the-dangers-being-nice\">Psychologytoday<\/a>\u00a0 \u6709\u4e00\u7bc7\u6587\u7ae0\u767b\u4e0a\u4e86\u9ede\u95b1\u6392\u884c\u7b2c\u4e00\u540d\uff0c\u7f8e\u570b\u81e8\u5e8a\u5fc3\u7406\u8aee\u5546\u5e2b Robert Taibbi \u63a2\u8a0e\u300c\u5584\u826f\u7684\u5371\u96aa\uff08The Dangers of Being Nice\uff09\uff0c\u4e26\u9019\u6a23\u5b9a\u7fa9\u4e86\u300c\u597d\u4eba\u300d\uff1a<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u300c\u4ed6\u5011\u7e3d\u662f\u70ba\u5225\u4eba\u8a2d\u60f3\u5468\u5230\uff0c\u96a8\u6642\u6e96\u5099\u597d\u4f38\u51fa\u63f4\u624b\uff1b\u81ea\u9858\u627f\u64d4\u5225\u4eba\u4e0d\u60f3\u63a5\u4e0b\u7684\u4efb\u52d9\u3002\u4ed6\u5011\u5c0d\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u611f\u60c5\u8b8a\u5316\u5f88\u654f\u92b3\uff0c\u9078\u64c7\u9000\u8b93\u800c\u4e0d\u8207\u4ed6\u4eba\u722d\u8faf\u3002\u4f60\u751a\u81f3\u96e3\u4ee5\u5bdf\u89ba\u4ed6\u6709\u4f55\u53ad\u60e1\u3002\u300d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h4>\uff03\u4f60\u6709\u7fa9\u52d9\u7576\u500b\u300c\u597d\u4eba\u300d\uff1f<\/h4>\n<p>\u300c\u4ed6\u771f\u7684\u5f88\u9700\u8981\u6211\uff01\u300d<br \/>\n\u300c\u6211\u4e0d\u80fd\u62d2\u7d55\uff0c\u4e0d\u7136\u5c31\u6c92\u4eba\u5e6b\u4ed6\u4e86\u3002\u300d<\/p>\n<p>\u7576\u4f60\u9019\u9ebc\u5c0d\u81ea\u5df1\u558a\u8a71\u7684\u6642\u5019\uff0c\u6709\u6c92\u6709\u60f3\u904e\u9019\u5176\u5be6\u90fd\u662f\u4f60\u81ea\u5df1\u60f3\u50cf\u51fa\u4f86\u7684\u5462\uff1fTaibbi\u00a0 \u4ee5\u904e\u53bb\u63a5\u89f8\u7684\u75c5\u60a3\u70ba\u4f8b\uff0c\u4ed6\u8a8d\u70ba\u8a31\u591a\u4eba\u5bcc\u6709\u5f37\u70c8\u4f7f\u547d\u611f\u3001\u628a\u4ed6\u4eba\u7684\u60c5\u7dd2\u611f\u53d7\u770b\u5f97\u6bd4\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u9084\u91cd\u8981\uff0c\u5176\u75c5\u6839\u5f80\u5f80\u6e90\u65bc\u300c\u81ea\u5c0a\u4f4e\u843d\u300d\u3002<span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>\u7576\u4f60\u89ba\u5f97\u81ea\u5df1\u6c92\u6709\u88ab\u91cd\u8996\u548c\u9700\u8981\u7684\u50f9\u503c\uff0c\u5c31\u6703\u53bb\u627f\u64d4\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u671f\u671b\uff08\u7121\u8ad6\u9019\u4e9b\u671f\u671b\u5408\u4e0d\u5408\u7406\uff09\uff0c\u9760\u586b\u88dc\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u9700\u6c42\u4f86\u6eff\u8db3\u5167\u5fc3\u7684\u7a7a\u6d1e<\/strong><\/span>\u3002\u63db\u8a00\u4e4b\uff0c\u770b\u8d77\u4f86\u662f\u5728\u6eff\u8db3\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u9700\u6c42\uff0c\u5176\u5be6\u662f\u5728<span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>\u6eff\u8db3\u81ea\u5df1\u300c\u88ab\u9700\u8981\u7684\u9700\u6c42\u300d<\/strong><\/span>\u3002\u4ed4\u7d30\u60f3\u60f3\uff0c\u90a3\u4e9b\u6709\u6c42\u65bc\u4f60\u7684\u4eba\uff0c\u6709\u54ea\u4e9b\u662f\u771f\u7684\u5225\u7121\u4ed6\u6cd5\uff0c\u975e\u4f60\u5e6b\u5fd9\u4e0d\u53ef\uff1f\u9084\u662f\u7d14\u7cb9\u77e5\u9053\u4f60\u4e0d\u6703\u62d2\u7d55\uff0c\u6240\u4ee5\u624d\u60f3\u628a\u4e8b\u60c5\u4e1f\u5230\u4f60\u8eab\u4e0a\uff1f<\/p>\n<h4>\uff03\u7576\u4e00\u500b\u300c\u597d\u4eba\u300d\u70ba\u4ec0\u9ebc\u5371\u96aa\uff1f<\/h4>\n<p>\u5982\u679c\u4f60\u7e3d\u662f\u90a3\u500b\u597d\u4eba\uff0c\u90a3\u9ebc\u6709\u6f5b\u4f0f\u5728\u53cb\u597d\u8868\u9762\u4e4b\u4e0b\u7684\u5fc3\u7406\u5371\u96aa\u6b63\u5728\u4fb5\u8755\u4f60\uff0c\u4f8b\u5982\uff1a<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>1.\u8ca0\u9762\u60c5\u7dd2\u5167\u5316<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u6c38\u9060\u5584\u826f\u7684\u4eba\u4e26\u975e\u6c92\u6709\u60c5\u7dd2\uff0c\u800c\u662f\u628a\u8ca0\u9762\u60c5\u7dd2\u5167\u5316\u4e86\u3002\u6240\u6709\u4e0d\u6eff\u7684\u7a4d\u7d2f\u6700\u7d42\u6703\u6f14\u8b8a\u6210\u6028\u6068\uff0c\u4f34\u96a8\u6291\u9b31\u3001\u7126\u616e\u7684\u7522\u751f\u3002<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>2.\u81ea\u6211\u6279\u8a55<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u597d\u4eba\u5f88\u660e\u767d\uff0c\u4ed6\u5011\u6bd4\u5176\u4ed6\u4eba\u66f4\u5bb9\u6613\u8cac\u5099\u81ea\u5df1\u3002\u89ba\u5f97\u81ea\u5df1\u4ec0\u9ebc\u90fd\u7121\u6cd5\u505a\u5f97\u5b8c\u7f8e\uff0c\u8f9c\u8ca0\u4e86\u8a31\u591a\u4eba\u7684\u671f\u5f85\u3002<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>3. \u7121\u79c1\u8b93\u4f60\u8b8a\u5f97\u81ea\u79c1<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u7576\u4f60\u5c0d\u5225\u4eba\u592a\u597d\u7684\u6642\u5019\uff0c<span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>\u4f60\u6703\u5c0d\u4ed6\u5011\u7522\u751f\u540c\u6a23\u4e0d\u5207\u5be6\u969b\u7684\u671f\u671b<\/strong><\/span>\u3002<\/p>\n<p>\u300c\u6211\u5c0d\u4ed6\u9019\u9ebc\u597d\uff0c\u4ed6\u4e5f\u61c9\u8a72\u8981\u56de\u5831\u6211\u3002\u300d<br \/>\n\u300c\u6211\u4e4b\u524d\u5e6b\u4ed6\u9019\u9ebc\u591a\uff0c\u9019\u6a23\u7684\u8981\u6c42\u4e0d\u7b97\u904e\u5206\u5427\uff1f\u300d<\/p>\n<p>\u800c\u7576\u5225\u4eba\u4e0d\u80fd\u6eff\u8db3\u4f60\u7684\u671f\u5f85\u6642\uff0c\u4f60\u53ef\u80fd\u6703\u8b8a\u5f97\u61a4\u6012\u548c\u618e\u6068\uff0c\u7121\u5f62\u4e2d\u4e5f\u8b8a\u6210\u4e00\u500b\u81ea\u79c1\u9b3c\u3002<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>4. \u7121\u6cd5\u5efa\u7acb\u826f\u6027\u89aa\u5bc6\u95dc\u4fc2<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u4f60\u548c\u5468\u906d\u4eba\u5011\u7684\u89aa\u5bc6\u95dc\u4fc2\u53ef\u80fd\u7f3a\u4e4f\u6df1\u5ea6\u3002\u4f60\u9078\u64c7\u59a5\u5354\uff0c\u6c38\u9060\u4e0d\u8aaa\u51fa\u771f\u5be6\u611f\u53d7\u548c\u4f60\u771f\u6b63\u60f3\u8981\u7684\u6771\u897f\uff0c\u7f3a\u4e4f\u8aa0\u5be6\u548c\u89aa\u5bc6\u611f\u800c\u7522\u751f\u4e00\u7a2e<span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>\u7121\u885d\u7a81\u4f46\u819a\u6dfa\u7684\u95dc\u4fc2<\/strong><\/span>\u3002<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>5. \u4f60\u6703\u5728\u61ca\u6094\u4e2d\u5ea6\u65e5<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u4f60\u6703\u5c0d\u901d\u53bb\u7684\u6a5f\u6703\u611f\u5230\u6094\u6068\uff0c\u5f8c\u6094\u81ea\u5df1\u6c92\u6709\u53bb\u505a\u4f60\u60f3\u8981\u7684\uff0c\u800c\u4e0d\u662f\u5225\u4eba\u60f3\u8981\u7684\u6216\u671f\u671b\u4f60\u505a\u7684\u4e8b\u7269\u3002<\/p>\n<p>\u7576\u500b\u597d\u4eba\u662f\u4ef6\u597d\u4e8b\uff0c\u4f46\u4e0d\u5fc5\u5949\u70ba\u6559\u689d\u3002\u6bd4\u8d77\u7121\u6b62\u76e1\u7684\u4ed8\u51fa\uff0c\u5efa\u7acb\u660e\u78ba\u7684\u500b\u4eba\u908a\u754c\u624d\u662f\u9996\u8981\u3002\u7562\u7adf\u7121\u6cd5\u597d\u597d\u611b\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u4eba\uff0c\u5225\u4eba\u4e5f\u4e0d\u6703\u91cd\u8996\u4f60\u3002<\/p>\n<p>\uff08\u53c3\u8003\u8cc7\u6599\uff1a<a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/intl\/blog\/fixing-families\/201807\/the-dangers-being-nice\">psychologytoday<\/a>\uff0c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifehack.org\/303623\/9-bad-things-happen-when-youre-too-nice\">lifehack<\/a>\u3002\uff09<\/p>\n<p>\uff08\u672c\u6587\u63d0\u4f9b\u5408\u4f5c\u5925\u4f34\u8f49\u8f09\u3002\u9996\u5716\u5716\u7247\u4f86\u6e90\uff1a\u300a\u5927\u8c46\u7530\u6c38\u4e45\u5b50\u8207\u4e09\u500b\u524d\u592b\u300b\u5287\u7167\uff09<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u300c\u6211\u6015\u5225\u4eba\u89ba\u5f97\u6211\u96e3\u76f8\u8655\u3002\u300d \u300c\u6211\u4e0d\u5e0c\u671b\u9020\u6210\u5225\u4eba\u7684\u56f0\u64fe\u3002\u300d \u300c\u6211\u4e0d\u60f3\u88ab\u8a0e\u53ad\u3002\u300d \u300c\u6211\u60f3\u4fdd\u6301\u597d\u5f62\u8c61\u3002\u300d \u9019\u4e9b\u8a71\u5c0d\u4f60\u800c\u8a00\u5f88\u719f\u6089\u55ce\uff1f\u8fd1\u65e5\u5728\u570b\u5916\u77e5\u540d\u5fc3\u7406\u5b78\u7db2\u7ad9 Psychologytoday\u00a0 \u6709\u4e00\u7bc7\u6587\u7ae0\u767b\u4e0a\u4e86[&#8230;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":203,"featured_media":43229,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65],"tags":[255,526],"coauthors":[16309],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12605"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/203"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12605"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12605\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":43230,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12605\/revisions\/43230"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/43229"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12605"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12605"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12605"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/buzzorange.com\/vidaorange\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/coauthors?post=12605"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}